Worst advice ever

Some advice just is not worth listening to.  Here are some bits of advice that men have been given that probably won’t help you.  What is the worst advice that you have been given about women or relationships?

Everything would be easier if women just learned to say what they think. As I’ve told my girlfriend, I ain’t guessing what she means. If she answer something else than what she means then it’s her problem. – DahDougie.

Thanks for your advice DahDougie, and good luck with that approach.  If you continue with your plan AND if she’s still your girlfriend in 3 months, let me know so I can post you a hundred dollars – got a feeling I won’t have to pay up on that. J – StrongLovingMan.

The whole saying “Treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen” is rubbish.  That only works if you’re a cat.
Kelvin.

An old man who’s been married longer then I’ve been alive told me to always do everything she asks once, and then never again.  E.g. if she wants some plants moved and replanted, do it, but then the next time if she wants it again tell her to do it herself or get a gardener.  Otherwise, he said, she will get in the habit of asking you to do too much stuff and she will be too demanding.
G.C.

An old man told me that there are times to just tell her to stop being emotional start being rational.  E.g. when her child died, she was still upset a year later and crying in the kitchen and he told her that is just time to get over it and to be a good mother to the other children she still has.  Now that I’ve been married a while I don’t think that’s really practical or good advice.  I’d be more inclined to just listen, say that I care and not invalidate her feelings.
M., Qld, married.

A man I have a lot of respect for told me that blunt, honest truth is always the way to go. I thought about that and I just don’t think blunt is necessarily helpful. There’s also a thing called tact. Imagine saying these things to your wife…

10. “You look great for a woman who has had four kids.”
9. “This is almost as good as mom used to make.”
8. “Thanks for the new shirt. It’ll be great for working on the car.”
7. “That’s a great new hairdo, Honey. How much did it cost?”
6. “I never knew you could sing that close to pitch.”
5. “I like it when you wait until halftime to vacuum.”
4. “Whaddaya want me to say? Okay, you look fabulous.”
3. “This … meatloaf is a neat color.”
2 . “Yes, that actress is beautiful, but you’re pretty on the inside.”
1. “Wow, that makeup works wonders!”

The jury may be out, but I reckon tact is probably a virtue.
– Sam.

When I got married, an old guy told me to get a jar and some jelly beans. He said, in the first year that you are married to put a jellybean in the jar every time you have sex. Then for the rest of your life, every time you have sex, take a jellybean out of the jar. If the jellybean jar is empty by the time you die, you’ve done all right. At the time I believed him but if I’d done that, the jellybean jar would have been empty after about 2 ½ years of marriage. It’s a myth that sex dries up when you get married. If you treat her right, it doesn’t have to be like that.
Jason, married long enough to know.

Always try before you buy.  If you don’t you could end up with someone who is a dud in bed.  Plus, if you want the wedding night to be really special for her, you should have enough experience with other girls to make it really good for her.
Gerry, England.

Lots of people say, “You have to look after yourself first.”  That’s not always true.  I don’t think that works in practice.
L. W.

So he told me: Whenever you’re talking to a woman, like you know, what you’re really saying is, “That’s nice now can I take you to bed?” or maybe “Yeah your hair looks real nice so let’s go back to my place now.” And they know it too. He’s single.

G.M.